name change

After nearly two years of Chris.Jackson.Lewis as the title of this blog I have decided that most people who read this might already know my name...and so I changed it to The Wonder Years- mostly because I always had a crush on Winnie- but also...that Fred Savage... didn't everyone want to be his friend? His Dad was kind of rough but caring, his sister was a hippie, he fought with his brother nonstop, his Mom always loving and then there was Paul-- we all have a Paul like that in our lives..don't we?

Besides the title of the show I just think it's a fitting title...the wonder years...

discoveries

Things that I have discovered since being here:

Living in the United States is almost like living in Canada except for the following things that I've noticed:

1) driving is ridiculous- anyone and everyone pushes the limits....yellow lights are treated like green lights and the first 5 seconds of red lights are yellows...

1a) I've seen someone pulled over by the coppers at least once a day...sometimes twice.

2) the gas stations make you pay first...this is annoying.

3) the pizza is generally better.

4) the location of all signs and stop lights make no sense- (a problem Jay and I encountered on our Minneapolis to Winnipeg trip).

5) not everyone owns a gun.... but my roommate does own one for hunting purposes... not for 'git off ma land' purposes.

More things I have discovered:
6) the musical stylings of: Patty Griffin, Aaron Espe and Josh Radin...all excellent additions to anyones collection.

7) that international development is more complicated than I ever imagined...

8) Americans think I know everything about curling.

On the Road to Hell...

The very first book I read as part of the program here is called "The Road to Hell: The Ravaging Effects of Foreign Aid and International Charity". I know from the title that you might be expecting some kind of feel good story, however this book was, in every sense of the word- sobering. It is 300 pages of the money driven industry disguised as 'foreign aid' which, as Maren argues is really a billion dollar industry used to strengthen Western footholds in other countries to extend their reaches of power. It describes NGOs (non government organizations) in like manner and paints a shocking picture of mis-managed funds, child sponsorship scandals and UN apathy. I think that if I ever am in the position where a young 20 something comes to me and says 'I want to change the world through NGOs and the UN-- I'll say, that's great son...but first, why don't you read this book..."

After reading Maren's book it is tempting to throw the baby out with the bath water and say "well, if the governments are corrupt, the NGOs and specifically USAID and the UN are more interested in million dollar contracts than helping people... then should we actually be trying to help people? aren't we doing more harm then good?

His argument is an interesting one and goes something like this: Foreign aid (food for example) does not help to develop a people in crisis. Instead what he found (specifically in Somalia in the 80's and 90's) was that
1) refugees had no desire to move from the camp and begin to 'farm' or whatever it is that NGOs try to teach them to do to regain some kind of stability because, after all, why work when you get fed for free. (related to this is the fact that foreign suppliers (read: USA) supply specific kinds of foods and, over time- try to acclimate the culture to American food, so that they'll buy from them when/if the foreign aid is gone)

2) The number of refugees is always exaggerated by NGOs because it will mean more dollars, bigger contracts and longer work... it also means more food is shipped than necessary--
which leads to 3...

3) Foreign Aid is power to local militia because since there is so much extra food, the corrupt government (Somalia, 80's - 90's) gives it to the the makeshift military who end up making a bundle off of it by selling it on the black market. In this way the corrupt government keep the corrupt military on their side because they are getting rich off the deal. They then use the money to buy weapons...as Maren says “It's like a mini arms race fueled with food.”

However.... this means that the extra food ends up being sold for dirt cheap which drives down the prices that honest farmers can get for their crops-- they go bankrupt-- so even if someone tried to earn a living by farming, they couldn't because food is so cheap.

There are some good quotes...here's some favorites:

"Chris and hundreds of others, he had realized that charity and development work are political, that doing relief and development work in the context of oppression is counterproductive. Any real commitment to development requires political action, speaking out against the powers that keep populations from developing themselves” 88

“It wasn't just the former state-owned farms that were being snapped up by Siyaad's inner circle. Traditional farmers were forced out of business by low prices and were either driven off their land or forced to sell it cheaply. In essence, the West's surplus grains were subsidizing the production of bananas and other crops that did not compete with Western agricultural interests” 170.

“There was something poetic about the way he and others stole from the UN and NGOs, used the money to build houses, and then rented those same houses back to the UN and NGOs.” 176.

“Somalia had become addicted to aid, its political system so accustomed to ingesting large amounts of foreign cash, that, like any redundant junkie, it had reached a point where withdrawing the aid would do more damage to the system than keeping it flowing” 180.

“The real beneficiaries of the aid program were, and are, the American equivalent of Siyaad Barre's inner circle. They are a small group of men with connections and money and influence. They are America's merchants of grain” 197.

There's also some interesting chapters on Save the Childrens child sponsorship scandal and the ways in which the media creates wars... fascinating stuff...

.

students

If you can find yourself an American address to ship books to.... www.half.com is gold!

GOLD.

I haven't totaled everything yet but a ballpark guess would be that I saved probably between $300-$400 thanks to this site.

I get to read this...

Among other readings the homework for "Biblical Faith and Economics" includes two chapters from Ron Sider's "Rich Christians in an Age of Hunger"... for homework.... woot woot.

“Is creating wealth bad? No. The Bible says exactly the opposite. Is God engaged in class warfare? Not at all. Scripture never says that God loves the poor more than the rich. But it does regularly assert that God lifts up the poor and disadvantaged. And it frequently teaches that God casts down the wealthy and powerful in two specific situations: 1) when they become wealthy by oppressing the poor; or 2) when they fail to share with the needy” 53.

“God's Word teaches a very hard, disturbing truth. Those who neglect the poor and oppressed are really not God's people at all- no matter how frequently they practice their religious rituals nor how orthodox are their creeds and confessions” 59.

“In evangelical circles today it is much easier to insist on an orthodox Christology than to insist that God has a special concern for the poor. We have allowed our theology to be shaped by the economic preferences of our materialistic contemporaries than by Scripture. And that is to fall into theological liberalism. We are not nearly as orthodox as we claim to be.” 65.

Incidentally Ron Sider sat behind me in church the other day.... and he's a keynote at the conference

thoughts about being here.

The previous post was a poem by Wendell Berry who is an American author that I've been meaning to get into for quite some time. I was glancing at some books that my new roommate has and there it was- a collection of poems by the big W.B.

Essentially things are different here. I wouldn't say they are bad or that my experience has been negative in the least but it's obviously not familiar and familiarity has been my life for almost 6 years. Everyone is pretty nice at the seminary I'm staying at but I wouldn't say that I've necessarily 'connected' with anyone just yet, in that way where you just know you can make a joke (eg. paul eats cereal loudly and it drives me nuts!) or when you can be unconscious of the amount of
noise your making or the manner in which you prepare your dinner, or the amount of time you take to shower...or the way you drive with strangers in the car or the music you're listening to... right now it's so 'tip-toey' all the time. From past experiences I'm guessing this will probably take about 2-3 weeks to change for the better but time moves slowly when there's not much going on.

There are a couple redeeming factors to all of this though. The first is that I'm excited about the classes I get to take- they are: Applied Research and Evaluation (which I'm more nervous about than excited), Research and Issues in International Development, Economic Development for Developing Countries and Biblical Faith and Economics. It's a bit heavy on the economics front but the assignments I've seen from the syllabi sound interesting (ie. evaluate the developing methods of the documentary 'born into brothels' or 'discuss the relationship of economics and the kingdom of God') So, I am excited to start classes on Tuesday.

The other factor of goodness that I'm holding to is that I'm convinced that there's something divine about being here. Leading up to the big move I became suddenly aware of how much I loved my life in Toronto- how much I loved my friends, my job...even the city of Toronto. I became increasingly sad at the prospect of moving because it meant leaving all of these things behind. I was sharing all of this with a trusted friend when he suggested something that I think will shape my time here. The thought..epiphany as I experienced it...was something like- God has given me so much, much more than I ever dreamed of or imagined for myself- and its like God might be saying that for a time it's going to be gone... I'll be removed from the familiarity, the friendships, the family, the networks, the jobs... and that it's going to be just me and God and we're going to figure this out together- apart from all of the influences of home and the busyness that comes with being there. That in this year away I'm going to slow things down in a sense and figure out who I am and where I'm supposed to be and all that jazz.

"In having known fully the
goodness of that, it will be
good also to melt."

So, in short- it sucks to be away but I'm content to be here.

Wendell Berry

How exactly good it is
to know myself
in the solitude of winter,

my body containing its own
warmth, divided from all
by the cold; and to go

separate and sure
among the trees cleanly
divided, thinking of you

perfect too in your solitude
your life withdrawn into
your own keeping

-to be clear, poised
in perfect self suspension
toward you, as though frozen.

And having known fully the
goodness of that, it will be
good also to melt.

arrived.

It's Friday night and we just finished a long, long day of orientation at the building in Valley Forge, where most of our classes are going to be held. It's been a bit of a whirlwind week that began with the departure from 493 Cummer Ave. to the digs back in Smithville where I spent most of my time running around buying the necessities or finishing up some paperwork- or running around with the kiddies. Then came Thursday morning at 7:30am- time to go to Philadelphia.

I arrived at the Seminary where I'm staying at about 6:00pm- so the drive was a little longer than I expected but I did have to stop for about 30 minutes at the border- and I got pulled over by a state trooper for speeding (yikes!!!!), so that took some time...and is going to cost some money...

Last night was roommate introduction time (a good guy named Matt originally from Wisconsin), room set up, a viewing of the latest episode of "The Office" and just enough time to catch sports centre (athankyou Paul Randall for access to the sling box) and off to bed.

More thoughts to come about this whole experience but for tonight...c'est tout!

the time has come

After cramming way too many things into the last three days, the time has just about arrived to place a couple more things in the car and head out. I've got some posts brewing about this whole adventure so far but it looks like they'll have to hibernate for a few more days.

the last day

Okay, so that video wasn't all that easy and on some computers you can barely see the picture-- so I've got some work to do.

I'm currently 1/3 of the way through my official last day at The Gateway. I love this place. I especially love Tyler Thrasher who I get to work with today. He is quite possibly the best gateway supervisor I've ever known.

well that was easy...sort of.

I was just messing around and recorded Jay learning the cello- this is him after 30 minutes of practice (in his life).

2007

Okay, my goal for the rest of my life (or until I accomplish it) is to figure out how to make videos with my digital camera and post them on my blog. I think this will be better than just pictures of the trip. Let's call it- a documentary. How exciting.

book list

The book list of 2006 consisted of...(in chronological order).

The Secret Message of Jesus by Brian Mclaren. I thought this book was alright. I found that the secret wasn't all that secretive. 7 out of 10.

Managing Non-Profit Organizations by Peter Drucker. For the kind of book it was I thought it had some great insights about leading volunteers, fundraising and other non-profit kind of things. A 7 out of 10.

Irresistible Revolution by Shane Claiborne- Good book- recommend it to anyone. It's very easy to read and is full of Shane's experience as political and social activist. It also describes the new monastic community he started with some friends called The Simple Way. 8 out of 10.

blue like jazz by Donald Miller- This was probably the 6th time I read this book. Love it. 9.5 out of 10

The Last Word and the word after that by Brian Mclaren. I held off on reading the last book of the New Kind of Christian Trilogy because I needed some time to digest the first two, which I really liked. The theme of the third installment of Dan Poole and Neo's story is the formers understanding of Hell and his journey to reach some conclusions on the matter. As always, Neo pointed out some things I didn't know but... also, as always, left me a little confused, which I suppose is his point. Good book though. 8 out of 10.

Completely Pro Life by Ronald Sider. This book discusses a consistent ethic of human life as it relates to abortion, the poor and nuclear arms. It was written in the early 80's so the argument about abortion and nuclear arms was a bit dated (ie. references to wade vs. roe and the big bad soviet empire), but the part about the poor was real good. 7 out of 10

eleanor rigby by Douglas Coupland. I really liked Life after God a couple years ago and finally read another Coupland. The basic premise is a 36 year old single woman discovers she has a 21 year old son who is terminally ill and who comes to live with her. The description sounds sappy but its actually a fairly entertaining book essentially dealing with the main characters sense of loneliness. 7.5 out of 10

To own a Dragon by Donald Miller. I would say I liked this book 3rd best out of the four that I've read (followed by BLJ and Through Painted Deserts). It was interesting, light hearted and at some points laugh out loud funny. Don's a great writer but he'll be hard pressed to ever exceed Blue Like Jazz. 7.5 out of 10

Blankets by Craig Thompson. Buy this book. That's it, no description -it is simply a book that if you ever get the chance you should buy it. The coming of age story of a boy who is raised in the christian subculture and then leaves the faith. 9.5 out of 10.


I might be missing some but that's all I can think of. A fairly light year but after reviewing a few syllabi for this coming school year-- 2007's book list is going to be ridiculous. yikes.

the house.

I realized that I don't really like being alone. By alone I mean- in Toronto at my house with no one around for days on end. I thought I would like this a little bit but I'm not a big fan. I wish Paul Randall was here. Jay and Jay are at Urbana and Chris Clements is at a dinner party for the rest of my life (it would seem). The good news is that I got some work done at Wesley Chapel, watched a couple movies and even picked up a digital camera (I'm a little behind...) so that I can document my year in the south.

To combat the emptiness of this house I invited a couple of the youth over for some serious video gaming. It'll be good to hang out with them for a couple hours.

So far I like facebook.

the book of faces

For a long time now I've tried to be against things that are trendy. I suspect this has something to do with my pride and/or stubbornness- although I'm not sure in which ways. Par example, I refused to watch the t.v. show '24' for the simple reason that everyone was watching it. After three years I cracked, watched one episode which was swiftly followed by the entire season...and then two other seasons.

The same will be said of Facebook. After about a year of 'facebook this' and 'facebook that', I decided that I would join. Now, just so you don't think I'm a slave to trends I would like to clarify that IF I was staying in Toronto and in relative contact with friends there, then I doubt that I would join. However, in light of the impending move to school-- I think it might be a good way to stay in touch.

So, facebook away.

Haggard

sex scandal in the evangelical church.

I came across this interview with Tony Campolo about the scandal. I loved what he had to say and was especially impressed with the way he ended the interview.

thank God for...

Wesley Chapel doesn't have a Senior Pastor...ah crap...
You can find more of these videos here.

al r hounsell

I've known Al r Hounsell since 2001 and the days of Leading Edge. We've seen a lot in our time together at Tyndale, including a number of councils, one 6th floor apt. and some genuine good times. Al recently started his own blog- boring so far, but I'm sure it will pick up in light of his new theological positions. Here's to you Alan:

the weekend.

I took the kiddies to Acquire the Fire this past weekend. I forgot that I hated it.

Opps.

It wasn't all bad though, the kids had a good time and Skillet was amazing.

Today I got my oil changed at Mr. Lube- it was the single greatest oil changing experience of my life. All I had to do was sit in the car while the staff provided me with complimentary newspapers and beverages. I imagine this is the male version of a trip to the spa.

Good Fences Make Good Neighbors

The blog title was the name of a play I was in for Gr. 12 Drama back in the day. The line that was repeated constantly throughout the drama was "Good neighbors make good fences and good fences make good neighbors". I was reminded of this today when I read that the US is building a 1000 km fence to keep illegal immigrants out of their country. In the play the neighbors end up becoming suspicious of one another (what are they hiding over there?, why can't I see what's going on?) and the morale is that good neighbors don't have fences.

You can read about the fence here.

I wonder if we'll reach the point where the US needs to put up a fence to keep out Canadians? I also wonder if there's a better solution than a 1000km fence?- such as helping Mexico become a place where a person is able to make a living and actually wants to live there...

Red is the new White

About a year ago we saw the emergence of those white bracelets that were all about making poverty history. Now, apparently red is the new white.

The new red campaign. hmmmmmmm....
Summary: With Bono and Oprah as the spokespeople, large corporations have agreed to give a portion of their sales to developing countries going to the Global Fund to eliminate AIDS in Africa. Example- 1 $200 ipod is worthy of a $10 donation from Apple to the fund.

I appreciate the thought, the percentage of money and the effort. However I think it is a fairly sad commentary on the western world that we need to be motivated by ipods and designer jeans in order to give money to the poorest of the poor.

IF I was going to buy an ipod, I probably would buy a red one. However, since I didn't plan on buying an ipod, I'm still not going to spend the $200 just because $10 goes towards life saving drugs. If I really cared I would donate straight to the cause without the thought of a reward or what I can get out of this deal.

There are probably going to be a lot of people (errr- middle-upper class white people) who do get involved and pat themselves on the back for splurging for that extra ipod all in the name of humanitarianism.

That is weird.

Really weird.

Humanitarianism.
Buying an ipod.
Humanitarianism.
$100 jeans.
Weird.

The really strange thing is that it probably will be a successful campaign- when simply telling someone that people are ACTUALLY DYEING wouldn't be much of a motivator.

Ian has some thoughts on the matter here.

If you don't need that ipod, Mike Todd has something you could try--donating straight to foundation of the world's leading AIDS activist, the Stephen Lewis Foundation with nothing but a receipt to show for it.

The Trip

Oct. 13, 5:15am
I wake up when my dad comes into the room and says that I'm late. Jay and I were supposed to fly to Minneapolis but had a late start as we were supposed to leave the house about 30 minutes earlier-- not a good start to the day.

5:34am.
A quick stop at Tim Horton's (despite our being late, we've always got time..) for a medium dd and we're off again.

5:45am
Driving along the QEW, everything is fine.

5:46am
White out conditions.

5:51am
We see our first car stuck in the snow trying to depart the highway. A quick survey of the scene tells us that this guy is going to need some help, and with not a lot of people around... 1st car pushed out of the snow.

5:58am
Turn on the radio for this little tidbit "Buffalo is experiencing an unprecedented storm in the history of weather" - no jokes, that's a direct quote. (3 hours later we hear this little nugget "If you have an emergency you'd like to share on the air give us a call"-- ya, if I'm in an emergency, the first thing (or last thing) on my list of to-do's is to call talk-radio.)

After that it was pretty crazy- we decided to press on to the Buffalo airport, despite the fact that we knew our flight was delayed- this was an adventure! After an hour and half of waiting for the Peace Bridge to open we finally crossed the border into the war zone that was Buffalo-- massive trees down everywhere, deserted highways, no power- it was crazy. Anyway, we spent the morning pushing cars out on route to the airport, which we arrived at around 10:45am, to find out that our flight had been pushed back to 7:30am, the next morning.

That was the first day of operation: visit Ian and Lauren (with a quick stop at a wedding in Minneapolis). It was a great 36 hour with the Mclarens-- full of poker, Arrested Development and my first ever trip to the Olive Garden.

grocery list?

I haven't posted anything of real substance in quite a while, as Fulford would say, it's mostly been "the grocery list". I don't think I intended for this blog to become that (listing the events of the day...) it just sort of happened. However, someone did say something that struck me in church yesterday. We had a guest speaker in at Wesley Chapel named Raif. He's short, Egyptian and loves to laugh. He is also an evangelist, which made for a pretty good Sunday morning on Warden Ave. His sermon was essentially on the Good Samaritan and while I don't remember all of his points, I do recall one tidbit that jumped out at me.

I have always understood Jesus' story as one where we are called to emulate the Samaritan, who unlike the priests and the Levite, actually helped out the wounded man. I figured this involves things like taking care of people who are in need, loving the unloved, crossing the road and going to the hurting people. This I believe is still an important part of the passage. What Raif said that stuck out to me was that he, Raif, was the man on the side of the road, and that I was too, and that in our broken, beat up state- Jesus crossed over to my side of the road, brought me to a near by inn and paid for my recovery.

Anway, just thought that was an interesting twist to the story.

Going away to a pastor's retreat this week with the Free Methodist Church. Who would have thought that 3/4 of Epiphaneia would be going on a pastor's retreat together?.. that is strange, but I gotta say, I'm looking forward to some serious poker and interesting dialogue.

format

I wasn't digging the black anymore-- it was a little too 2005...

Highlight of the day: a trip to Blockbuster with Mike Albano where he rented Lost, season 2. He mentioned that he's putting together a 24 marathon for season 3 sometime in the near future.... I'm not sure I could handle that much Jack Bauer in a day but I'd give it a shot.

Also, it's a terrible feeling to arrive at a meeting that you find out was yesterday...opps- gotta find that dayplanner asap.

in class

Yes, I'm in class. I hadn't pictured this scenario four months ago, but here I am, sitting in the chapel at Tyndale on a Monday night, listening to a new psychology prof. talk about fetal development. What could be better? I'm not a student (t.a.ing...), but being in this class is actually kind of fun.

Here's a sample 'story' from a frosh--- classic frosh, keeping the stereotypes up...

(about a mothers strange cravings during pregnancy).

frosh: "My mom craved Vic's when she was pregnant with my brother"
class: "vic's?'
frosh: "ya, like that Vic's Vapour rub stuff, my dad says she ate it like ice cream"
class: 'ewww'.
frosh: 'yo check this out the cool thing is that my brother's never had a cold a day in his life...'

classic.

nostalgia

It's September 1st, which means a renewed commitment to my blog. There's a chance that I'll have my own dot com before I move, but for now blogspot will have to do. What's happening? Well, most recently I watched the Tyndale videos that Ernie put together a couple years back. I'm just starting to realise how great those times were. I suppose it caused a sense of nostalgia, which I think is amplified by the fact that I'm not starting school in a week for the first time since kindergarten- strange feeling.

In other news, Ian and Lauren are moving to Manitoba. This move (in less than 24 hours now) is a sad one for me, even though its good for them- three years aren't really that long though- Lord knows the last three have gone by pretty quick.

for Cathy

I'm not sure if it's spelled with a 'C' or a 'K' (I'll go with C), but the last two times I have seen Cathy Mclaren, one of the first things she says to me is "you need to update your blog".

And so, for you Mrs. Mclaren- the blog is officially updated. It was nice visiting with you and Jim today- Pickelbarrel tomorrow- I'll see you bright and early!

A couple thoughts for tonight-
1) Ashley and I went to see Nacho Libre and, to be honest I had that whole Napoleon Dynamite first time feeling after I left. That is to say, after watching N.D. the first time I didn't laugh once through the whole thing, however I did watch it many, many times after that and it got progressively more funny- until about the 13th time, then I think it peaked. This movie had received a lot of hype, so I had high expectations- and it probably would have been more funny if some people in the audience weren't having falling out of their seats in laughter at some parts that really weren't funny- but, at least I got to see midgets wrestling, and that was well worth the price of admission (no offense to little people- I'm a fan of "little people, big world", sort of).

2) This week is crazy for drafts, with the NHL draft yesterday and the NBA coming up on Wednesday. I'm very excited to see what develops with the Raptors, however it's the Leafs who are making some noise. I was pretty happy with their pick and the trade for Raycroft but it seems that multiple sources are reporting that the Leafs are in serious discussions for Pronger. Now, as I Leafs fan I do tend to think that all players in the NHL could eventually end up on the Leafs and the media would have me think that every free agent will sign here this summer etc., but Pronger as a Leaf? holy smokes. For the record I don't think this is going to happen- my hunch is he'll go to Ottawa. Stinkin Sens.

C'est tout.

American up here...

Last Monday Steve and Nathan and I went out for lunch to talk about the conference and where we see this whole thing going next year. In response to something I said Nathan tapped me on the front of my head and said "That's because you've got American up here". This moment was probably the most outraged I've been in a long, long time. It was borderline sin. Well, okay... sin.

Lately I've been thinking about Americana and what it would be like to live there and subsequently what exactly do I think about their culture and specifically-war, because really, most of what I know about the States revolves around war. I have the opportunity to study there next year, so I figured I should really start thinking about these things, in order to avoid blindly becoming a card carrying Republican (or Democrat for that matter), if I end up going.

I think there are a ton of issues to think through here, but my initial sentiment is that I'm a pretty big pacifist. I can't really see a scenario that justifies blowing the hell (they are fighting evil...right?) out of another country- even something like 9/11. Recently I have seen two documentaries that attempt to show the other side of the war coin in America- Loose Change which is about the shadiness of the 9/11 events, and Why We Fight, which shows the war in Iraq as the result of a tradition of lies, increased Imperialism and the rise of the military industrial complex (priorities which are set to benefit corporations as opposed to what benefits the country- ie. contracts given to weapons producing corporations). Why we fight has a number of interviews with people from Iraq, who say that they supported the U.S. until they started bombing them- their neighborhoods- their parks- and until the vast majority of the people wounded or killed in this war were civilians.

I have also been reading a book by Shane Claiborne called Irresistable Revolution. He has some very interesting stories about interning with Mother Theresa and fighting policitians for the rights of homeless people in Philadelphia. He also talks about a trip to Iraq- I found it particularly interestingl- He says "essentially I went to Iraq because I belive in a God of scandalous grace. I have pledged allegiance to a King who loved evildoers so much he died for them, teaching us that there is something worth dying for but nothing worth killing for".

Maybe I only think this way because I was raised in Canada and we're the peacekeepers. Or maybe what I'm really trying to understand is what are the politics, ethics and practices of a people whose citizenship is more about a kingdom than a country.

"dunner" aka: firetruck

I don't think I've posted a picture of these two online yet... welcome to my blog Benjamin and Katrina... nephew and niece..



- they don't look like the blueberry girl from wonka in real life...not sure what is going on with this computer..

Favorite lines from Benjamin include: dunner (a firetruck..), lion, no, and unca Ciss...

Thursday night was my last class ever at Tyndale UC with only 1 exam to complete the undergrad. The last class was a bit of a doozy, with a group presentation that went off the tracks for a solid 7 minutes, (complete with references to the problems with the Emerging Church of all things!) only to slowly return and make an alright recovery. I realized that I have a problem laughing during awkward situations, although I was aware of that before. I don't think that I have stopped to think about what life after Tyndale will feel like, or to reflect on what has happened in the last five years but I've got some time to do some soul searching.

My thesis is finished, marked and handed back. I did okay for blasting that thing out in 3.5 weeks...although it did have some weak points, which Professor Evans was sure to drive home during my defense...thanks dawg..really appreciate that.

Hanging out with Cam tonight for the first time since Christmas, my guess is that the hockey game and a pub will be invovled.

my personal...

The idea of church, its value and function, its life and processes, are formed within us as we learn about and experience it. Everything that I understood church to be was the result of being raised in one. I think this may be true of a lot of what we might call "the younger evangelicals" (book still on my shelf... summers coming!), who grew up in the albatross that is the evangelical church. Now, I must admit that I did not have a particularly negative experience in my 'home' church. In fact, I still have a lot of family friends there and speak with the youth pastor on a regular basis. The trouble was not with my church but more so with my understanding of it, which at some point contributed to my very elitist, personal church.

I was an idiot.

To be quite honest, I really had no time for churches from other denominations, let alone the Catholic church- dear goodness-we should drop off some tracts. I suppose I had no concept of church history, the universal body of Christ or the notion that my church might ever be (gulp) wrong. I'm not saying that it is, or was, only that I didn't understand the church as a group of people whose messy lives are connected in this thing called salvation, and that its not, and probably never will be a perfect community.

All of this to say, I think that the idea of personal church is what has caused so much anger when people dissect and critique the Emergent Church because it is different than what we have come to know as 'the church'. We think that if there is another way to 'do' or 'be' church, that our way is wrong and thus the Emergent Church is an attack on our 80 year old traditional church. We think that we have to defend our church and our church practice, that we must go on the offensive to prove that EC is wrong and thus be validated in our own experience of church. After all, if our church isn't wrong, our church doesn't need to change.

I don't think that right or wrong is the question I'm asking. I was speaking with Craig Carter the other day and he made this statement, "I'm more concerned about why 450 people are showing up on Saturday than whether Mclaren's understanding of the atonement is orthodox". Regardless of right or wrong, why is this happening?

I don't expect many answers soon, its probably hard to pinpoint and involves a lot of, shall we say...conversations. Nonetheless, I'm happy that its happening and am more excited about the future of the church than ever before.

the day after

An entire 13 months of planning all came to a head yesterday- and I honestly need to say that I was overwhelmed by how good God is- demonstrated so many times throughout that period, and especially yesterday. Overwhelmed.
Nathan has summed up a few of his highlights, so I'll try not to duplicate too many...but here's a list of my favorite things about yesterday, beginning with...
* The guy sitting on the green couch while Don Miller is being introduced: Chris to Don: "Do you know that guy?" Don to Chris "No. I thought you knew him." Chris to Don "Ah crap".
* The craziness that was 7:30am-9:30am.
* Chris Seay might be one of my new favorite people- I didn't get to sit in on his sessions for too long, but from speaking with him over the couple of days he was around- wow.--- warm, friendly, congruent.
* Our volunteers were absolutely AMAZING- I'm not sure I have words to describe how good they were yesterday- and how God used them to bless people- seriously- outstanding. Thanks Alicia, Siobahan, Dirks, Jardin, Sarah, T-Pot, Nathan, John, Naomi, Rachel, Christina, Joy Beth, Danielle, Sharon, Michelle, Dan, Katie, Fulford and Ashley!
* The random people I met who were so encouraging.
* I wasn't in the first worship time, but I was in the second and I was overwhelmed by presence of the Spirit in that room- never experienced anything like it at Tyndale before. Jay, Big D, Katie and Dave K.- thank you so much.
* Having my arm nearly ripped off by our President as he created a moment that I will never forget- and yet its a blur even now- it happened so fast, but his words will stay with me for a long time.
* The atmosphere, the joy in people, their graciousness.
* An email from George and a phone call from Pernell after the conference.
* The crazy things- such as not knowing where Mclaren or Miller were for the first hour...or losing a large amount of money, only to find it in the garbage- athankyou Lord.
* Encouraging words from our new friends, Don, Tom & George.
* Chris Ricci and his team.- so much preparation- and so well done. To me, IT does well when you don't notice them (ie. not looking back to see why the sound guy has screwed up...)- as long as I've worked with Chris Ricci, I have never looked back- so professional, hard working- and wants it to be as good as we do... thanks Chris.
Finally...
* The boys and all of our MSN meetings, restaurant meetings, the speaker phone, forums, the bp, the emails,- the hours and hours... something good has begun, and I love that its with each of you. Single tear.

Anyway, those are some things off the top of my head. I might post some more later- maybe some pics to go with it. You can find tons of extra stuff at the website- and please, if you were there- take advantage of the forums and try and flush out and wrestle with all that you took in.

four weeks and counting

The time has almost come.

I think the travesty of my time at Tyndale will be that I didn't take advantage of an environment of learning. Somewhere around year 3 I learned how to do well without really learning anything (so I may have learned one thing...). This, I think is what Garber talks about in the Fabric of Faithfulness when he says that students "'getting all A's but flunking life' is a possibility lurking around the corner of everyone's life.."

One of the things that I am most looking forward to after graduating is learning.
Although my thesis has been great and I have learned a ton of interesting things-- mostly that the authors of Scripture had some serious literary talent, that the history has a message, and that understanding life through personal wants/desires was part of the lowest point in Israel's history-- so how much of it should be part of my life?

The rough copy of the thesis has been handed back- one week until the final copy is due.
The Boys Next Door clinched a playoff spot.
OCCAA volleyball championship- I announced my official retirement in an emotional press conference - Canon 25 didn't show up.
OCCAA basketball championship- M. Mackneer, Kyle and BIG BOY!- three peat baby! I would like to thank Nathan for some serious heckling- I feel like together we accounted for at least +7 tyndale points and -8 Redeemer points...
The conference is SOLD OUT! holy smokes.
Going to the Leaf/Sabres game with Ashley and the Boadways on Thursday....I'm nervous...its in Buffalo.
I saw Dave Arnold last weekend- woah- its been too long between visits.
Elections are coming-- should be very interesting-- no..I have decided not to run.
Spring Banquet with Bodner is coming up- Mar. 31
Concert....Robbie Seay Band, Chris Seay, Ginny Owens, Waterdeep, and...an artist named Rob Pepper-- April 7th at Tyndale.
Oh..I friggin love my housemates-- and I realize that's a fairly girly thing to say but what can you do?...maybe the most fun I've had in a long time! Paul, can I have a cookie?...two?
Ah yes, the biggest decision of my life is coming... the fork in the road, which way to go? I applied to Eastern's Graduate School in Pennsylvania (is that how you spell it?) to do an M.A. in International Development... so Lord... ?

four weeks and counting.

the NBA

If you've followed the NBA in the last 5-10 years or so...this article is hilarious-- especially Babcock's 'comments'.

the week so far

We knew this was coming. You never want to say it out loud (unless you're Harry Neale or Bob Cole) but Team Canada was terrible. Terrible you say? Maybe its not that they were terrible as much as we weren't 2002. That was an epic time in my life and produced many moments that I will never forget. Where was the Sakic Supreme this time around? Where was the pass between the legs, the dazzling stickhandling Theo Fleury, the "the whole world wants us to fail, but we'll be there"--remember that?

Death where is thy sting? Ovechkin- that's where.

I like him, except when he plays for Russia- that kid is good. Maybe the best player in the world right now.

We looked lost the whole tournament and today wasn't a surprise based on how we've played. Hindsight is a beautiful thing and we could argue about who would've made the big difference. But, we look forward to you 2010 and revenge on home ice. We look forward to you our Captain, J. Iginla (strangely ineffective this tournament) playing along side the likes of a battletested Staal, Spezza and Crosby, Nash, Phneuf... with Luongo in net- fresh off a Stanely Cup victory with the Leafs.

Well, it's hump day and the thesis is a lot further than it was on Sunday night...13/60 or 47 to go! Is that glass half full or what!

reading week

It's you and me thesis, let's do this.

emerging churches

Andrew Jones said this way better than I ever could.

"I have been listening to the latest wave of criticism against the emerging-missional church in USA and I don't know if i am more angry with the critics for getting it so wrong, or angry at emerging church practitioners for either not communicating the heart of what we (the global emerging-missional church) are doing . . or not knowing it in the first place.

The emerging church, if i listen to the more extreme critics, is just about changing the style of church to attract people and keeping them happy, of accepting any wind of doctrine without critique, of finding the coolest hippest trends and adopting them in a sunday service. Of being postmodern to attract postmoderns. Of careless adoption of any ancient practice regardless of its origin or affect, of finding identity in protest against the Modern, Enlightenment or Constantinian models of church. What the heck is that? What does that have to do with the emerging church? If there are one or two new emerging churches who have lost the plot, or never saw it clearly to begin with, and are now giving the other hundreds of emerging churches a bad name, they should be lovingly confronted with the better way of Jesus. Do it yourself before other traditions do it for you. A little yeast impacts the whole lump....

Read the rest here.

k[no]w Emergent!?

As some of you may already know, I’m organising a conference with a couple goods friend called The Evolving Church. We invited Brian Mclaren, Donald Miller and Chris Seay to come because their writing has struck a chord with us and we feel like they are saying things that we needed to hear. We think this is a good thing.

What I have found in the last couple months of planning this thing is that a) people think this is an Emergent conference and b) there are some people who think Brian Mclaren and company are the anti-Christ. First, I’d like to clarify some things about this conference. We are in no way pushing the Emergent ‘agenda’ (whatever that may be), but are really concerned about the Church and feel that there are a lot of people our age who may be thinking the same thing. Our experience inside church was not necessarily detrimental to our understanding of the Church, but we think that Church, especially in North America, has not been in operating in the manner which God has called it to.

Yes, Brian and Chris are forefront in the Emergent movement but this isn’t a conference to discuss Emergent, its to discuss how we, as the Church in Canada can take on the vocational attributes that we may be lacking. It is not a ‘local church’ bashing conference, but a chance to understand where we can go from here.

It’s sort of my running joke with Fulster that Emergent has left itself undefined, contributing to the overall stigma that it is simply pushing a post-modern agenda. Ie: what do they believe? "we don’t know, they just won’t say…" While I will admit that Mclaren has been more publicly inquisitive than affirming in regards to issues of doctrine, Emergent has defined itself here at Emergent Village

Some people may not agree with this or other Emergent ideas, or the things that some people who associate themselves with this movement write, (Sweet, Pagitt etc.) but that doesn’t disqualify them from speaking about the state of the Church in the 21st century, does it?

I have come across some blogs that spend way too much time dissecting every sentence of these people as their act of service. I have found that every time I read these blogs it leaves me disappointed, not because I’m pro Emergent but because it is often done with a mean spirit, using absolute propositions and leaving no room for dialogue. It has been my experience that these statements only lead to putting people on the defense, which only further a separation between the two sides and certainly isn't edifying. Emergent may be wrong about a number of things…its true! But saying ‘you are wrong and I’m right and that’s that’ is only widening the denominational divide among believers. It’s like I have to take sides between Emergent and non-Emergent. To think this way is to miss one of the points of the movement, which is to recognize that denominations have destroyed us and if we could only talk about our differences with open minds and a heart that is seeking to be faithful to God, then we’d be much more effective as ambassadors of Christ.

In other news, I dropped C.S. Lewis and picked up Managing Non-Profit Organisations. I like it. Our floor hockey record: 2- 0- 1, but that may change soon as our goalie will be away for most of the rest of our games, so I may be strapping on the pads—seems like a fitting end to a my last season (Lord willing!).

tagged

I don't normally respond to these kind of things but since Nathan Colquhoun has requested it, I will defy his (usually correct) instincts and reply. I was tagged...

Four Jobs I've had:
Blockbuster "rewind boy"
Selling Snowboards @ Skiis and Biikes (why two i's in bikes.. ? not sure either)
Relief Worker @ The Gateway
Maintenance @ Fair Havens

Four Movies I could watch over and over:
Braveheart
Home Alone
Magnolia
Back to the Future

Four Places I've lived:
Smithville
Toronto
Huntsville
Beaverton

Four T.V. Shows I love:
Arrested Development
Wonder Years
The West Wing
Seinfeld

Four Vacations Spots I've been to:
northern Ontario..
Peru...not exactly a vacation though..
Boston...
Philadelphia

Four Favorite Dishes
spaghetti
chili
pizza
rolaids!

Four Sites I visit often:
www.yahoo.com
www.theglobeandmail.com
www.epconference.net
www.thestar.com

Four Places I'd rather be right now:
Smithville
Beaverton
anywhere with AJ
Blue Mountain

Four Bloggers I'm tagging
http://www.puritas.blogspot.com
http:eemc.blogsome.com
http://www.thebrooks.blogspot.com
http://thesilverstrian.blogspot.com

the election.

For anyone who wants to know what Stephen Harper is really up to...these may be the funniest commericals I have ever seen- no jokes. Yum Yum is my favorite, but this one is good too!

Jack

1143 times. That is the amount of times that someone has asked me if my middle name started with an "S". Imagine if it did? Two C.S.Lewis' in the world- no way! Unfortunately, or otherwise my middle name does not begin with an S. The only reason I bring this up is because I chose a class specifically devoted to the writings of C.S.Lewis as my very last class at Tyndale- the last one! Where does the time go...

I think over the next little while much of what makes in onto this blog is going to be devoted to sharing what this 20th century literary artist has to say. I begin with a quote from book one of Mere Christianity,

"The most dangerous thing you can do is to take any one impulse of your own nature and set it up as the thing you ought to follow at all costs. There is not one of them which will not make us into devils if we set it up as an absolute guide. You might think love of humanity in general was safe, but it is not. If you leave out justice you will find yourself breaking agreements and faking evidence in trials 'for the sake of humanity,' and become in the end a cruel and treacherous man."

Absolutism... it's destructive. Thinking that I am right, that I have all the answers to the most pertinent questions is destructive. Now, there are things that I believe to be absolutely true and I don't think that Lewis was essentially arguing for an absolute principle. But in the context of the church...here is exactly what I wrestle with: who is right, who is wrong and does it really, honestly, truly matter? At the moment, I'm not convinced that it does. Of course, if someone started baptizing in a church with pig's blood while wearing little to no clothing...my 'not caring' would probably go out the window and I'd look for some sort of standard by which to function as the body of Christ. The bible you say? I just need to talk to Nathan Colquhoun about this...

Jokes. Really, he's a great guy who's asking some questions too.

In other news, I'm also going to be giving a thesis report every now and again. So far in terms of page numbers I'm 0/70, but that's not terrible...it could be worse, right? I could not have a topic... well, let's not get into that.

surprise additions

Beth Veale has been added to the list of conference workshop leaders. Don't know who Beth Veale is? She is a principle at a gradeschool in Toronto, and in the words of Darryl Silvestri, "she's money baby, money". Also, Jarod Siebert has been added as a workshop leader- I believe he was part of a church plant a while ago called Next Church in Kingston. Now he works for the Mennonite denomination as a church advisor. Everything is coming together...and REGISTRATION IS OPEN!

church practice.

I heard a story the other day. Apparently the underground church in China is exploding. The first thing that struck me as different from church in the West in that this church is led almost entirely by women. The reason for this is largely unknown, however its speculated that the native men may think that the Christian faith is the equivalent of being a panzy and so they stay away. This sounds funny coming from a country where freedom of religion doesn't really exist.

The second thing I heard about the underground church in China is that a lot of the churches (which are unconnected) have their own little quirks that sound fairly ridiculous to us. For instance, before embracing Christ, one of the current leaders of a church spent three days in mourning because of their sin. And so the church that this person leads requires each person to spend three days in mourning once they choose to follow Jesus. Another leader vomitted just before conversion. Apparently they thought this should be common place and so now the true mark of a Christian for this church is to vomitt at the point of conversion.

This sounds ridiculous and totally unbiblical but...

Think about our churches. Is there anything we do that is like these traditions? Think of this- the altar call. We know what it means. It is not unexpected in some of our churches and it is usually associated with a conversion experience or the first step towards salvation. The altar call was first used by Charles Finney as a way to sign up recent converts to fight for the abolition of slavery. Of course, the altar call experience is not found in Scripture but somehow we manage to make it a focal point of our evangelism services. Oh well, I guess that's just part of becoming a Christian...right... no?...

podcasting

I'm looking for some good podcasts. Any suggestions?

the Outrage of Grace

I'm reading this book. It's a shock to the system-- the good kind though. The first third of the book is a novel about two people having an affair. They are purposely never condemned or interrupted by the narrator with random acts that may reveal their rendevous - scandalous. The author comments intermittently and is often quite funny and sarcastic. Here's a taste:

"I said grace cannot prevail until law is dead, until moralizng is out of the game. The precise phrase should be, until our fatal love affair with the law is over- until, finally and for good, our lifelong certainty that someone is keeping score has run out of steam and collapsed. As long as we leave, in our dramatizations of grace, one single hope of a moral reckoning, one possible recourse to salvation by bookkeeping, our freedom-dreading hearts will clutch it to themselves. And even if we leave none at all, we will grub for ethics that are not there rather than face the liberty to which grace calls us. Give us those parables of the Prodigal Son, for example, and we will promptly lose its point by preaching ourselves sermons on Worthy and Unworthy Confession, or on The Sin of the Elder Brother. Give us the Workers in the Vineyard, and we will concoct spurious lessons on The Duty of Contentment or The Moral Aspects of Labor Relations.

Restore to us, Preacher, the comfort of merit and demerit. Prove for us that there is at least something we can do, that we are still, at whatever dim recess of our nature, the masters of our relationships. Tell us, Prophet, that in spite of all our nights of losing, there will yet be one redeeming card of our very own to fill the inside straight we have so long and so earnestly tried to draw to. But do not preach us grace. It will not do to split the pot evenly at four A.M. and break out the Chivas Regal. We insist on being reckoned with. Give us something, anything; but spare us the indignity of this indiscriminate acceptance.

Lord, let your servants depart in the peace of their proper responsibility. If it is not too much to ask, send us to bed with some few shreds of self-respect to congratulate ourselves upon. But if that is too hard, leave us with at least the consolation of our self-loathing. Only do not force us free. What have we ever done but try as best we could? How have we so hurt you, even by failing, that you should now turn on us and say that none of it makes any difference, not even our sacred guilt? We have played this game of yours, and it has cost us."

Christmas

Okay, I realize this is about one day too late, but get over it.

This Christmas was different. Leading up to the big day I felt differently about Christmas than ever before. I don't really know why, it's not like there have been drastic family changes, or that I have done anything intentional to celebrate Christmas differently, however like most things these days, I'm changing the way I think about this whole event.

First of all, the whole debate about xmas bla bla blah- can the church really make this argument? Like most things we debate about, the root of the matter stems from the fact that we really only care because it means we will have less of a voice in Western culture. I think that in all likelihood (and this is pure conjecture) that most families probably celebrate Christmas exactly the way most pagan families do- presents, food, family, church. The only difference is that we are free to send Christmas cards that say things about Jesus on them.

I would argue that maybe we should start saying Happy Holidays because that is all it is. My friend Andrew wrote an article about the name of the Lord, using the Hebrew words qatan (small, insignificant) and qavod (heavy). He basically says that Rabbis refused to use the name of the Lord because it was too heavy, and they didn't want to risk treating it with insignificance. I think we throw Christ onto a holiday that is essentially about ourselves, 'the haul' and the time off to relax. It has nothing to do with Christ- he is small, insignificant.

And so, maybe Happy Holidays is appropriate- at the very least its more reverent than saying Merry Christmas and then spending a billion dollars on gifts and gorging ourselves on turkey.

Oh the bitterness, where does this all come from?

It's not all bad. I did get to spend Christmas eve at the shelter and let me tell you that I loved it. Over the course of the evening, a couple people stopped by. My favorite was a family of five, with three little kids. They were handing out some gifts that they brought- nothing extravagant- but everything is significant when you have nothing. The highlight of the night had to be when the five year old boy of the family went up to a couple of scruffy homeless guys and said 'merry Christmas', and then handed them the gift. That was probably the most 'Christ-massy' this I've seen. I think if I ever ended up with a family that that is what we might do on Christmas eve...

Please don't get me wrong. I really want to say Merry Christmas, but honestly, if its just a thing to do, a tradition that we accept, then really Christ means nothing in it and I'll take happy holidays. Of course, I want it to mean something...the trick is figuring out how to do that. The first step may be to recognizes the epiphany of the Christ as a daily reality... the savior who was born- born into reality first with 10 fingers, 10 toes... smelly, pukey and adorable and then bruised, beaten and glorious.

"Suddenly, God's angel stood among them and God's glory blazed around them. They were terrified. The angel said, "Don't be afraid. I'm here to announce a great and joyful event that is meant for everybody, worldwide: A Savior has just been born in David's town, a Savior who is Messiah and Master".

The Chronic- what- cles of Narnia

For you big D.

The Chronicles of Narnia

Big Announcement

Finally it is time for the official announcement.

There is a conference in April that a couple good friends of mine and I are putting together. We think that the church has been and will continue to be changing in the next little while, for better or worse. We have all pretty much moved in our ideology from 'going to church' to 'being the church'...while still asking the age old question: what does that look like?

And so, The Evolving Church will be held at Tyndale on April 8th. Keynotes are Brian Mclaren, Donald Miller and Chris Seay, with a couple workshop leaders (keynotes will also be leading workshops) that we are very excited about, including George Sweetman, Pernell Goodyear, Brian Walsh and some others tba.

April 8th, Tyndale,..book it!

A Griswald Family Christmas?

If this is real, it's unbelievable. Christmas Lights 2

Watch Video

Blyss

A couple months ago I picked up the new Lifehouse cd, mostly because of the catchy song that was all over the radio, but I have been pleasantly surprised. In fact, I'd say the album is better than their first one, which is still a favorite to this day.

Jason Wade from Lifehouse used to be in a band called Blyss. I have never seen their cd around but one of their songs has surfaced in a couple different circles-- Storm

I suppose I should get back to paper writing...or do something else..

thrashers and watering holes...

I put in a couple shifs at the Gateway this weekend. A couple of leaf games, a whole lot of coffee changing, lockers and the 'white man' made for an interesting time. I really like that place. One of the shift leaders there is a man by the name of Tyler Thrasher. I'd like to give props to him for being one of the best dang supervisors in the world (shout out also to Scott- and a wedge of lemon..!?).

Also, I was at a new church in St. Catherines this past weekend. It was pretty trendy. I don't mean that in a negative way but I did feel like I was on a college campus (except most young couples had a couple of babies in each arm). There was however a good mix of the older crowd which I appreciated. There are four pastors at this church and not one of them is older than 33. What's more, not one of them has theological training, ha (funny how we think that seminaries= closer to God and qualified to tell me what to think about God)...although apparently one guy is doing graduate studies presently at a good school in the states. This church has doubled in size TWICE, in the last three years. They run a full time homeless shelter right out of the building. Two services, good worship and a good message. I think if I was home more often I might go back.

A quote from the service, "rules can never change character"- in a series called Graceland (I told you it was trendy). As hard as I try to surround myself with boundaries to keep myself from sinning, boundaries will not cause me necessarily to sin less or more. Rules can never change character. I heard that in Austrailia a lot of the farmers don't have fences for their livestock. How do they contain them? They put a watering hole around where they want the animals to stay so the animals never wander too far away, even though they could go as far as they want. Maybe we need a little more of that in the church. Maybe if we really believed that Jesus was the living water (apologize for the cheesiness) we would never want to wander away, we wouldn't need rules (read: no alchohol, no drugs, no swearing, no R movies, no smoking, no jeans in church or if you're from a generation ago- no cinemas, no bowling alleys, no card games!...) to try and make us better people. Rules can never change character- we just need to figure out how to stay close to the watering hole...

Well, I need a drink.
(interpret that how you will)

all rights reserved.

I was in a pretty big church the other day for Sunday morning service. It was pretty normal I suppose- stand up sing, sit down pray, listen to sermon, go home and eat...nothing out of the ordinary.

As I was flipping through the bulletin during the sermon I came across a section entitled "Steps to Peace with God". It did a pretty good job of outlining redemptive history in 3 sentences or so (does anyone else think that is a problem?) which included God's plan for peace and life, our problem and separation from God and God's remedy- the cross. Of course, once one understands redemptive history in this brief context, the opportunity for response is given: Admit, Repent, Believe, Receive. (I'm surprised it wasn't an acronym- something as easy as ABC...)

Regardless, that is all okay and I don't disagree that all of those things are part of the Christian life, however then came the good old sinners prayer...

Now, I know this isn't in the Bible but just in case someone who read this didn't know what to do or say after reading this and was apparently being convicted by the Holy Spirit to respond, they had a prayer to say that would seal the deal. The legitimacy of the sinners prayer aside, the funniest part of this whole thing is that right underneath this prayer it said, "Used by permission of 'insert well known evangelical association here', All rights reserved".

All rights reserved?
All rights reserved!

This is part of the problem. Like a good Western company they sought to monopolize, patent and reserve the rights to a prayer--a conversation with the Almighty God! Can you imagine this conversation between clergy and a recent convert... "Thank you for praying this prayer, if you could please just send a letter of recognition to this association for allowing you to be part of the kingdom"

Of course this wouldn't be an issue if we didn't reduce the story of redemption and the kingdom life to a prayer. When did this happen? How did this happen?

Where is God?

What are we doing?

What has the gospel become?

Summer

Living in a house with no heat (maybe this Wednesday?) makes me miss the summer. A whole lot of fun in a short, short time. Thanks to Sarah Cross for these pics.


A romantic moment on the docks in Orillia with C. Ralph.


I knew we'd get in. D-D-D Donna you're the star of the show.



Just another night during pre-season.


Deb, Mutter and C. Ralph.

Normal, IL

I have a confession. Before I share though I must set the context. Today I was cleaning out my car which was littered with gas receipts, cd cases, baseball equipment and a couple of tool kits. However, as I always do before I begin to clean the car, I put on a cd. It just so happened that a perfect cd was already in the player and I began to labour away to "The Normals". My confession is this: I love The Normals. As far as I know I'm the only person alive (or in Canada)who owns this cd. The tragic part about this whole love affair is that the band broke up shortly after I purchased their first album. I did find out that the lead singer took Derek Webb's spot in Caedmon's Call so maybe I can live vicariously through them now. Oh and Normal isn't actually a place in Illinois but I guess they thought that their town was pretty average.

The Survivor.

I stand in the bloodfield shell shocked and guilty,
The sole survivor of what we all had coming.
And feelings are fiction as we watch our loved diving
And for some strange reson we just keep on marching.
The ice that drips from isolation has melted me to this.
In all of my power this is all I can offer,
And it's broken, it's broken, it's broken.
But somewhere the good king has been claiming His victory,
And it's offered, it's offered, it's offered to the survivor.

My greatest confession is that what I claim dearly
is the very thing that leaves me so scared.
I know peace lies in silence and prayer is its heartbeat
But I don't feel it beating in me.
What if I find in the quiet that all I am is the sum of my habits.
In all of my power this is all I can offer,
And it's broken, it's broken, it's broken.
But somewhere the good king has been claiming His victory
And it's offered, its' offerd, it's offered to me, to me.

And your answer to my questions is to be still and know
That I Am and I Am Love and I Am and I Am Love.
And right here the good king has been claiming His victory,
And it's offered, it's offered, it's offered,
It's given, it's given, it's given to the survivor.


Here's the only Normals concert that I've ever been apart of...(only because of this link).
http://www.creativesitesmedia.com/normals/ram/normals_best_i_can.ram

The Gateway.

I got a job as a relief worker at The Gateway a couple of weeks ago. It's a homeless shelter for men in downtown Toronto. To be honest, I was a little nervous going into the whole gig. I wasn't really sure what to expect. I really only knew that I wanted to work there because for some reason I think that Jesus would've probably hung out there. The first shift was, well...boring. It was a night shift in which pretty much nothing happened except for 'wake ups' (every half hour beginning at 4:30am) and breakfast in the morning (a great perk to this job is that I get fed). The next couple of shifts were pretty good though. In fact I've worked a total of four now and I originally thought that the 12 hour shifts would feel terribly long but so far they don't. I discussed this with one of the workers on Saturday and he described it as "it's like you live at home for a time and then just move here for the day and live". Really, that's what I do. I live there during the day and hang out with people. It is by far the greatest job I have ever had. I'm not just saying that because it sounds like I'm a slacker but it really is great to watch t.v. or play cards or chess with a guy my age who just got enough cash to move into his own place, or the guy from Winnipeg who has a wife and kids in the Philippines but needs to save enough money to pay back the government for dual citizenship issues. I also met Patrick, well I didn't really meet him. I was kind of scared to. He seemed a little rough around the edges at first but all of that went out the window when he almost overdosed on opium on Friday. I thought I was witnessing my first death but the ambulance got there pretty fast and I think he's okay. While that certainly wasn't a funny thing...a friend of Patricks (I assume) was just screaming the f-bomb at him for continuing to use. It was kind of funny. I also thought it was funny when his buddy was poking around his pockets looking for drugs so that the ambulance/police officers wouldn't bust him in the hospital. One of the workers asked him to get some gloves to do so-- I thought at first because it would be hygenic...I later realized it was because he didn't want him to get pricked by any needles.

I like The Gateway. The guys there are really nice and not the typical homeless men you might see outside union station (although some are...). Most of them want to work and have temp jobs but for whatever reason (drugs and alchohol addictions do come into play) can't get on their feet. I like these guys.

I think sometimes we're scared of poor people. Isn't that ridiculous? Isn't that the most ridiculous statement ever? But it's true. We don't know how to relate or how to talk to them (like they are different?). I think it's because we're trained to see poor people as invaluable...as people who don't contribute to society or the economy and therefore aren't important. Think about it. A person with a BMW vs. a homeless man with a shopping cart... whose more valuable? Who do we trust more?

I remember telling someone that I worked at a homeless shelter. They stopped and thought about it for a second and said, "you know a lot of them don't want to get jobs and want to be there"... I think that is the consensus of society. I also think that if that is our attitude... we've got a lot of reading and thinking to do.

The prophets say that God has a heart for the poor, the marginalized, the mistreated...those without a family. Isn't that a tremendous characteristic of God... to defend the orphan and widow, the alien and homeless?

Jesus says, "the poor you will always have with you but you will not always have me". At first you might read this passage and think that Jesus just wants some time with his peeps but I think there is a greater statement here. What if Jesus is saying that because you are my disciples you will be around the poor because that's where I live and they need to be loved.

I'm at Nathan and Darryl's apartment after coming back from a wedding. Silas is here. I love Silas. He transferred to Waterloo after a couple of years at Tyndale. As a frosh at Tyndale he had these stubby little dreads but now they've grown down to his shoulders. This, combined with his newly grown beard make him look very 'rasta', as they say.

I remember this one time about three weeks ago when Darryl, Silas, Nathan and I were sitting around at the apartment talking about things that guys talk about. Silas interrupted someone's train of thought to say, "You know what guys, growing up I didn't have the greatest family situation but that's okay because now I consider you guys my family". Did I mention that I love Silas? I think that if you met Silas you would love him too.

Here he is.

It's Over

After two weeks, it is finally over. Leadership week/frosh week came to a blissful end at approximately 11:45 a.m. With the grass looking a bit greener and the smell of autumn in the air, I quite enjoyed rolling out of 25 Ballyconnor with a good friend and car full of luggage. I spent little time dropping Darryl off and picking up some things from the house I'm living in and proceeded directly to the 401 West on my way back to Smithville. Now don't get me wrong I loved a lot of this past little while but am definatley thankful for at least a couple days to myself. In honor of these past two weeks I think that I a top 10 list in in order.

10. Fair Havens: I realized how much I absolutely love that place when there are few other people around.
9. Working with Darryl and an 8 year old from Kitchener on the largest architectural project I have ever been a part of. I imagine it would take quite a storm to bring that sand castle down.
8. A road trip back from the Pinery featuring Pat, Fulford and Michelle Whiting. Comments like "I can't get enough of your love babe" and "you have a flat tire" combined with the quest for a gas station/ bathroom and a ridiculous amount of traffic made for some good times.
7. The new house. While the majority of my time there so far has consisted of me being relatively unconscious for 8 hours each time-- it is coming together and I'm definitely blessed to live with some great guys.
6. Michelle Whiting: "Do you want a chocolate bar?" and sitting on the bus together (although there was no leaning on each other)
5. The reunions. The night I saw Nathan for the first time in a while, combined with the surprise of Silas turned me into a giddy school girl for about an hour.
4. Ruth/Naomi, Peregrenatio and walking with me, or walking with you.
3. Derek Webb. It was different than the other concerts at Tyndale and he didn't speak as much as I thought he would but he was phenomenal. He gave us a tangible ministry to invest in that I think represents a lot of what we (as a Council) want the students at Tyndale to become aware of:
http://www.bloodwatermission.org --we're going to build a well.
2. I had a great conversation near the (as if) muffin shop with a good friend last week. I loved that conversation.
1. Council/Ministry Team/RA Team. I can not say enough good things about this team. I'm not really involved with the RA's too much but from what I saw--- they did a great job. And the Council/Ministry team did an absolutely incredible job in everything that they planned and made things fun while doing it. I am privileged to serve alongside so many great leading servants....

Random Things

It's been too long. You would think I would have given up on this whole blogging thing after being away for a while but here I go again. I had a rant ready to go about Christian culture after attending kingdom bound at Darien Lake with the youth group but I won't go there , mostly because I'd just be complaining. It's a blog for another day, maybe after I go to another Christian festival this Saturday, who knows?- it will depend on how much Jesus paraphenalia I see.

Anyway, things have been good. I went to the most perfect wedding of all time this past weekend. Congratulations e-dawg and Lauren. The day began with breakfast at Eggcetera which was followed by showers & Good Will Hunting and just when you thought the day couldn't get any better, two people got married! Even the reception was incredible, everything from the food to the speeches and the dancing... unreal how much fun it was. At a couple points during the day I did start to think that all this wedding stuff is strange--it's kind of like we're all growing up... about time I suppose.

That's it for today. Soon I'll be back in the swing of things but for now, let me leave you with this quote from Lewis' "The Magician's Nephew".

""But please, please- won't you- can't you give me something that will cure Mother?" Up till then he had been looking at the Lion's great feet and the huge claws on them; now in his despair, he looked up at its face. What he saw surprised him as much as any thing in his whole life. For the tawny face was bent down near his own and (wonder of wonders) great shining tears stood in the Lion's eyes. They were such big, bright tears compared with Digory's own that for a moment he felt as if the Lion must really be sorrier about his Mother than he was himself."

Do the chickens have large talons?

I found this today. If you're not sick of Napoleon Dynamite...it' s funny...real funny.

http://www3.state.id.us/oasis/HCR029.html

Why I LIve in The Village

This may be old news to some of you but I recently watched (for the third time) M. Night’s “The Village”. (warning: I'm about to explain the plot). The basic plot of the movie is that a group of people purchase a large area of land and set up a town in the style of 19th century America and pay the government to not allow any plans to fly over the land or allow anyone outside of the village to enter the town-ever. In doing so, they attempt to preserve the sacredness of a place unaffected by tragedies such as violent crime, war and even the use of money. The crisis of the movie comes when one of the characters, upon hearing of the engagement of a girl that he is fond of, proceeds to repeatedly stab the fiancé in the stomach. In this way, a society that was supposed to be segregated from violent crime has been marred by a terrible incident that seemingly will result in death if new medicines from ‘the towns’ can not be retrieved in time. Now, to go along with this the elders of the village (those who started it) have led those in the village to believe that there are monsters in the woods (those we don’t speak of) and that they have reached a deal with the monsters; they don’t go into the woods and the monsters will not come into the village. The elders have implanted the idea of fear into the minds of their children to keep them from being corrupted (ie. Discovering the truth about their town).

Our society is built on fear. A simple perusal of the 6 o’clock news will tell you to be afraid because terrorists have been active or be afraid because mosquitoes have killed another person or that someone has been abducted. Fear is paralyzing and does keep people away from things like transit, tourist destinations or even the highway. These fears, while in some cases exagerrated, are real.

This is real fear because it is real cause for concern. In the Village however the fear was in the minds of the those in the village and kept them from leaving. I had a thought that maybe I live in the Village because at least one aspect of society- consumerism, also leads me with the idea of fear. Let me explain.

Consumerism tells me that I am inadequate as I am and must purchase or be involved in whatever they tell me because without it, I am not as valuable. Thus fear is used to control first what I think of myself and second what others think about me. For instance, I own a very nice (rusty) Ford which is good for me. However, if I parked beside a brand new Mercedes- who does society instantly say is more important? Generally we will automatically associate expensive with worth and not just monetary worth but intrinsic value. To me, this means that I’m living in the Village. It means that people in our country are afraid to be poor because there is no value (instrinsic?) in poverty. It mean that we have all been sold a lie by the elders (Microsoft? Car dealerships? Schools, Malls?) and we have (generally) failed to venture into the forest for fear that ‘those we don’t speak of’ (being uninfluenced by societal values) will hurt us. By this I mean that we continue to accept the idea that more stuff means more value, higher tuition means better education, (Tyndale is really good at this…) or a lawyer is somehow better than a garbage man.

We can not believe this lie. My sense of value can not come from believing that I’m better by what I do or own. I can not be afraid not to be apart of something just because society tells me otherwise. The way to escape this village is to, like the blind girl (ironic?) in the movie to recognize these fears and venture into the forest. I suppose that in the forest may be a place that Jesus calls the abundant life. A life free from the fear that I must measure up to the standard of society-- a life free from being tied down with possessions, looking for value in comparison and free from this faulty concept of reality that we’re being sold everyday.

The trouble is that I can not move completely out of the Village unless maybe I moved very far north into a remote community free from the 6 o’clock news and malls. However I have a feeling that like the actual movie, just because I separated myself from what I perceived to be evil- evil would find me. The prophet Jeremiah says that the heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. This is why no matter how hard they tried, the people in The Village could not escape such a heinous crime. This is also why we will have to constantly recognize that we do live in a village of lies based on fear and must somehow push our way into 'the forest' in order to live in the truth.

the vertical Christian

The last couple of weeks I've noticed some lines in songs that say something like 'God is all I need', or 'all I want'. I like these songs as they are ridiculously catchy but I'm having a hard time meaning what I sing. I suppose the purpose of these lyrics would be to confess a surrendered life to Christ, which is an amazing thing. However, I hope this doesn't make me a poor Christian but when I hear these kind of songs, I think of things besides God that I need or want like water or sleep or a wife for example. Sometimes I need water more than prayer-- such is the case when it's 40 degrees outside. Or, for instance sometimes I need people. If all we needed was God we'd probably exist in individual realms with things like prayer benches, holy water and the presence of the Lord. Instead, I am reminded of the 'it's not good for man to be alone..."passage. And so we get a partner or rather-- people to share our existence with. I think this may be key to understanding what a Godward life looks like. Maybe my life needs a touch more horizontalness to it than the vertical Christianity I've come to know. In fact, maybe the purpose of sanctification is to become like God to other people and therefore a concrete being with which to interact? I think it is a fascinating thing to think that we are receiving the mind of Christ for the purpose of loving other people.

One of the places that its almost impossible to be a strictly vertical Christian is in community living. I have experienced some sort of community living a number of times and let me say that I think it's incredible for those who experience it and undervalued for those who don't. In community living you are not an individual so much as you are part of the whole. For example, while my name is Chris Lewis, I am part of what makes up 4 North dorm and also what is known as the 4th floor. While I am an individual my existence means that I am part of this web that collectively makes up residence or community life. I believe one trend we are seeing or will see in the church is the moving away from the individual Christian that modernity (if I can blame modernity?) has fashioned. The idea that 'my personal relationship with Jesus Christ' is distinct from any other believers in that it is 'mine' may be something we don't refer to as much in the coming years. Is it possible that this training of a personal relationship may have screwed the church up for a time as we are unable to share our fears, frustrations or even joys as we don't need to because after all, it's a personal thing. If we could ever move out of this western individualistic mindset that has become the North American body of Christ I think we'd be in for a few surprises..

I wonder what a vertically horizontal Christian would look like in terms of metaphor...a triangle? Any ideas?

*insert clever blog title here*

Hey everyone, (Heidi, Tom, Nathan)

I hope you all are doing well...really. The last couple of weeks have been remarkably crazy. I remember explicitly saying to one of my youth kids a couple of month ago two things: first, that I would probably never work for Fair Havens again and that I would never work for my home church again, ever. It's not that I had anything against either of these place- I mean, I love Fair Havens and I've known the people at my church for 20 years-- there is no bad blood there-- I just knew that I wouldn't be working there. And so, I planned my own thing. I interviewed for a camp job in T.O, got told that I'd work there for a summer and then be the director next summer--pretty good plan I thought. Of course I had some time to waste before the camp started, about 5 weeks worth.

I got home from Fair Havens last week...what a glorious 5 weeks of work it was. I can not even believe the amount of fun that was had. Here's some of my favorite things about this pre-season, in no particular order: Becoming way better friends with the Jon, Mike and Dan, I can't even believe how much I've grown to love you guys. Seeing Dan fall out of and be run over by a golf cart (don't tell Bob...). Writing a song and performing it with Mike...ah yes "Caitlyn and Sarah are our favorite guest services workers in the whole world...etc..etc.."--it's in the process of being recorded. Blue?...who is supposed to know that former Russian president Kruschev has blue eyes...I can't stand (and yet love) Trivial Pursuit. If they tell me I can't do high ropes...they're right (nice work Lindsay)...if they tell me I can't do a front flip in the pool...it's go time... 47 awkward attempts later...the front flip is mastered, and my back/head/neck is in serious need of a chiropractor. Drive in movies, falling windows, cabin painting, Thursday nights, taking one for the team and Bill Davis all contributed to a great month.

The plot thickens. The day camp is waiting for me when the time comes, but then I get the email heard around the world (or at least by those sitting next to me at the time). The day camp had low registrations and needed to look at things like job cuts, salary reduction etc. So- I put the word out to a couple of places, including (gulp) my church, letting them know I may be looking for a job.

I started working at my home church the day after I got home from Fair Havens. I'll be doing some day camp stuff, starting a college and careers group, helping out with youth and doing some preaching. To me, this is the funniest thing that could have happened. There's a proverb that goes something like "In his heart a man plans his course but the LORD determines his steps"....okay Lord, you've made your point.

This is what makes life so exciting. I wonder what will happen tomorrow?

altars for sinning

"Though Ephraim built many altars for sin offerings,
these have become altars for sinning”. Hosea 8:11

These two lines jumped out of the page the other day. I’m wondering if this is a warning that anyone who is involved with any sort of ministry or kingdom stuff in general should have plastered on the wall of their office. A couple of friends and I are involved in starting our own business that’s going to be doing some incredible stuff that we are very excited about. We feel like God has given us a similar vision and has opened all these doors to make this vision a reality. In turn I think that our motives are pure but the last thing I want is to have this thing that starts out right end up becoming ‘altars for sinning’ or ~ the exact opposite of what it was designed to do. I mean, there is a precedent for this sort of thing happening; think of any secular university that began as a seminary and now produces a generation (for the most part) of religious skeptics. Or young pastors who began with a passion for the hurting and then hit it big (dare I say - mega?) and end up with the beamers and a real estate business on the side. I guess the only way to really not have to worry about this is to never attempt anything. That is not an option, it can’t be. I guess a good old fashioned gut check every now and again and an earnest effort make sure that our “concern is not whether God is on our side; (but our) greatest concern is to be on God's side” (A. Lincoln) will mean there will be no ‘altars for sinning’.

Either that or we just stick to the business plan, right guys?

a little update

I must apologize for my tardiness the last couple of weeks. I've been in transition mode--moving from home in good old S-town (aka: Smithville,ON) to Fair Havens. So I went from blogging a lot because I didn't have much to do, to blogging never because there was always something going on...but I've missed it.

Do you ever wake up sometimes and have this amazing, profound thought and then ten minutes later you can not remember what the heck you were thinking? That happened this morning. I do remember that it was something about Jesus...

This past weekend I was honoured to attend the wedding of a couple of my good friends. Now, I must confess-- I really like both of those two; they are some of the nicest people I've ever met. During the reception someone mentioned something about how their lives were designed perfectly for them to come together to be married. I thought about that and realized that, holy smokes...its true. They each have had their share of serious family heartaches growing up but it is truly amazing to see the LORD bring them together so that the trend of brokennesss that occurred in each of their pasts has now become this very beautiful thing that is a new relationship.